Raining Cats and Dogs

Welcome to Mundanevision – Blogisode 2! Your weekly dose of strange and irrelevant chat.

Chris: Sophia, it’s your turn to pick a subject this week!

Sophia: I think we should discuss what most British people are famous for…

Chris: Queuing?

Sophia: No…

Chris: Ah… Tea?

Sophia: No. Talking about the weather.

Chris: Shouldn’t the props department have made us some tea and biscuits for this?

Sophia: If you could have a lifetime supply of biscuits, what biscuit would you choose?

Chris: Well. for this blog, it’d have to be bourbon biscuits because they are just so bour-ing and mundane. Get it?

Sophia: I like jammy dodgers.

Chris: That would make a good character for the biscuit adaptation of Oliver.

Sophia: Hmmm. Back on to the subject of weather… what would you do if it actually did start raining real cats and dogs?

Chris: I think I’d call the RSPCA and say “control your pets please”.

Sophia: Why does it have to be cats and dogs? Why can’t it be raining badgers and…

Chris: Bison? Badgers and bison? That would hurt. It would be like the hailing equivalent of raining cats and dogs.

Sophia: Then what would a thunder storm be?

Chris: Cows and llamas.

Sophia. Of course. And what about snowing?

Chris: It’d have to be something soft. Snow white kittens?

Sophia: Awwww

(She goes weak at the knees)

Sophia: Better stock up on cat food.

Chris: Can you imagine the weather reports? “We’re expecting fluffy kitten storms today”.

Sophia: Severe weather warnings. It’d be clawful…

Chris: Sophia weather warnings?

Sophia: No, severe weather warnings.

Chris: Severe Sophia weather warnings. How did we get on to the subject of tongue twisters?

Sophia: Peter Piper picked a pickled pepper?

Chris: Sally soul searches for sailors on the sea shore.

Sophia: I thought it was she sells sea shells on the sea shore?

Chris: And why can’t Sally be involved?

Sophia: Well in that case, can Peter sell sea shells on the sea shore too?

Chris: He can sell shirts for sailors whilst Sally and..

Sophia: The person who sells sea shells on the sea shore (gosh that’s a mouthful) doesn’t appear to have a name. I don’t thinks she’s ever had a name.

Chris: So it could be Sally after all?

Sophia: I suppose so…

Chris: What if “she” actually has a name that doesn’t rhyme with the rest of the tongue twister so she got struck off and is now not credited for selling the shells. Mundanevision: “writing” the wrongs.What if it was actually Barbara who sold sea shells on the sea shore?

Sophia: Red lorry yellow lorry red lorry yellow lorry red lorry (she continues with this for a few minutes. Chris looks confused). We can’t say much about that tongue twister can we?

Chris: Well, I find it strange that the drivers aren’t mentioned.

Sophia: Maybe they’re on auto-drive.

Chris: Microsoft is developing a driverless car. But obviously the inventor of the red lorry yellow lorry tongue twister came up with the idea years and years before.

Sophia: I’m not sure I’d feel comfortable in a driverless car. I’d prefer a car that makes popcorn.

Chris: A popcornmobile

Sophia: Yeah and caramel popcorn can pop out of its exhaust pipe. I wonder what Jeremy Clarkson would have to say about that.

Chris: I’m not sure he’d say anything he’d probably fire it from a canon or something with a horrified James May standing buy.

Sophia: And Richard Hammond scampering around trying to catch all the popcorn.

Chris: Yeah, with a bowl, like in a 1980’s computer game.

Sophia: I think popcorn rain would be nice. I’d just constantly walk around with my mouth open.

Chris: Bit dangerous though. Imagine the ads on TV: “Have you had a popcorn related accident? Do you know somebody who has been affected by popcorn? If so, call now or pop in and see us!”

Sophia: Yeah, imagine how many people have “popped” their clogs slipping on sweet’n’salty.

Chris: It would be a lovely way to go.

Sophia: I’d prefer to die in a fluffy kitten snow avalanche.

Chris: Can you imagine the headlines?  PERSON BURIED UNDER FURRY MOUND OF KITTENS.

Sophia: I think I’d prefer that to being drowned in badgers and bison rain.

Chris: Right, we’re off to get indoors quickly before anything like that happens. And I’m off to investigate who really did sell those sea shells on the sea shore.

Sophia: I’m still convinced it was Peter.

If you enjoyed our chat about the weather, you can look forward to our third “blogisode” next Tuesday… 

Uh oh… Catalanche…LOOK OUT!



About mundanevision

Every day could be a Mundanevision blogisode day, now that they are posting weekly .So Grab a cup of tea and a biscuit and get comfortable because you're going to read about the least trendy topics.It's a blog you really do want to miss...
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