Coming live and direct from a keyboard near you! Your weekly dose of the strange and bizarre is here!
Chris: This is a bit later than planned, in fact it is so late that there are bats and insects flying around! Why the bats Ryan? Did you entice them in again with your bat noises?
Ryan: I most certainly did not, bats give me the creeps!
Chris: Then why did you invite them? Were you hoping to see Bat man?
Ryan: I didn’t invite them, They just arrived on there own accord you see…
Chris: Oh I see, something I was wondering about Bat man actually… Is that bats come out at night and robins come out during the day so, Robyn is a rubbish side kick! Unless robins are moon lighting now.
Ryan: Very controversial!
Chris: Yes, but I need to get this off my chest. And another thing, cat women! Cats eat robins unless there very domesticated. And only eat whiskers. But how do cats eat whiskers? There attached to their face!
Ryan: Its like pedigree chum! Only pedigree dogs can eat it… And Yorkies, there not for girls. A bit derogatory / sexist if you ask me.
Chris: Ok, before we offend every comic book fan, I think I’d better change the subject!
Chris: Did you hear about that man who got a brain injury as a result of having a giant pine cone falling on his head?
Ryan: No sir…?
Chris: They didn’t mention the up side of the news story… What would the pine cone give him the idea to do. After all newton invented gravity as a result of an apple falling on his head. Is he now really good at furniture? Pine specificity!
Ryan: Where did you hear of this pine cone incident?
Chris: On the news. I think we need a chest of draws for the studio, don’t you? He’s our man!
Ryan: Sound like a plan, lets hunt him down!
Chris: I wonder if he pines for his old life!?
Ryan: Poor bugger!
Chris: Yes, poor guy. We should not make light of his prickly situation.
Ryan: You’re right, we shouldn’t. We need to show the poor guy some respect, yoooo!
Chris: Yes, I’m sorry pine cone guy. Apples and pine cones are not the same thing, we do apologies. Can you imagine if the guy was related to newton? Like his grate grate grate grate grandson?
Ryan scratches his head…….
Chris: They would be the most unlucky family in the world. Can you imagine just having random objects falling on your head?
Ryan, I can imagine, Horrid!
Chris: The plus side though is that they would invent things all the time.
Ryan: Humm, maybe not… You see if generation after generation were to have things fall on there head, more often that not resulting in brain damage, I would say that that it may well become hereditary. Thus the eureka moments may decrease over time…
Chris: I wonder if Bill gates came up with Window after being hit by a double glazed window?
Ryan: What a pane!
Chris: Or Isambard Kingdom Brunel had to wear a massive hat as he was hit by something and he wanted to cover the lump up.
Ryan: Oh yea… I think he was playing bridge at the time… Jaja
Chris: Ooh, I like the dots there, suspen-sion… I think this could be an entire book called ”History’s greatest hits”
Ryan: Staring Britney Spears. Hit me baby one more time.
Chris: I wonder if Britney would be any good at spear throwing?
Ryan: On a Britney ferry from Plymouth To Santander.
Chris: Santander always sounds like a Spanish dare devil to me…
Ryan: No match for Danger Ryan though!
Chris: ” Hello, my name is Santander! I will keep your money safe from criminals!”
Ryan: I will also evade tax!
Chris: OOh, very current and up to the moment.
Ryan, It was a grape one, wasn’t it?
Chris: It is too cold in this studio, I think there is an over draft!
Ryan: I think I’m going to have to withdraw.
Chris: Could somebody turn the heating on, the sloth is beginning to look like an extra from Avatar!
Ryan has just said he’s thinking sideway! So its up to me to keep calm and end the blogisode for I am the bat man! Seriously, can somebody get these bats out please!? Ok, I will try to shoo these bats and insects off and we will see every body next week.
Stay warm bloggers and readers, I have a very fetching pair of ear muffs on…